[UN]COMMON GROUND​

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All for His Good and Purpose

8/9/2018

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Last night seemed like any other night. After a long day of work, chores, and heat, we decided to go out. Cooking just seemed like a sweaty mess and with the heat, having the oven or stove on was something I wanted to avoid.

As my husband showered, he mention to me that he wanted me to think of affordable places to go to eat. I kept thinking Chili’s for some reason. This is strange because my go to is usually Asian or Mexican style dishes. He agreed to something different as well. He expressed he was tired of sushi, poki, and the norm.

What was hard about that day was that we have been disagreeing on a few different things, so tensions were high. It could’ve been the heat, it could’ve been a lot of things, but I was dreading being in a loud room with lots of noise even though I made the choice not to cook. I am a flight person in conflict. I was out of my element and fighting my emotions.

After aimlessly driving, we ended up where Chili’s was and finally gave in and decided on that. I don’t know why both of us were so opposed to going, but we were resisting that thought as if it it was breaking a rule. We parked and walked in.

Of course it was everything that I didn’t want to be surrounded by. It was loud and many tables of people were talking all at once and my patience was being tested. If any of you know me well I don’t do well with loud noise. I hear all the sounds all at once and it becomes too overwhelming.

I was sitting there in the booth sad and frustrated from the disagreement with my husband. I was trying to ignore all the sound around me, praying that it would just be a good night. At that moment a family was sat behind us. Little did we know God would be in the midst of all of it. Once again showing me how little my problems are and how selfish we can be in the midst of our problems.

The table that was sat behind me had a member who is an adult with Tourette’s and autism. He sat right behind me and was the loudest person I’ve ever heard. He screamed, he yelled, he made noises, he was just being himself. It was truly beautiful seeing the family take care of him so well. At that moment I realized my problems are so small. I have so much to be thankful for. So much of our problems are in the flesh and it distracts us from seeing reality.

The funniest thing is that Jake and I both ordered Mexican food. I pondered into deep thought and came to when Jake asked me, “what are you thinking about.

I replied, “ it’s kind of strange and I don’t really know why I thought about it, but eating these chicken fajitas reminded me of once in my childhood.”

I then told him how I was staying at a friends and her grandma took us out to lunch. Her grandma was wealthy and had many material things that showed her wealth. She prized her material possessions greatly. I had ordered the chicken fajitas and they weren’t that tasty. I felt really bad because I didn’t want to waste but I just couldn’t eat them. I remember feeling extremely guilty because of the way she made me feel. Not only that but I remember she yelled at me after we used the hot tub for dripping water on her wood floors. I cleaned it up with a napkin and apologized. I just couldn’t understand why she was so angry.

I just do not want to be that type of person. I do not want to come across stingy or caring so much about material possessions. We never know what people are going through at home and sometimes they’re only refuge is away from home in the comfort of someone else place.

Jake replied, “ it’s funny that you said stingy and how you never want to be stingy.” He then went on to say I feel like God is telling us to pay for that person’s meal behind us and it’s going to be around $120. He said I really have been fighting that feeling but I really think We need to. I said, “okay, let’s do it.”

It is amazing that God will give us confirmation from others to encourage us to do what He has told us. He used a memory of a random time that I have not thought of since I was 11 years old. He used a food dish to trigger that memory. He used sounds and compassion to let us see a little piece of Him. He used sadness and frustration to show us joy that only comes from Him. He uses everything beautifully for His glory and good.

We can’t always see right now from the outside why God says to do certain things but that’s the trust of knowing that he does all things for good according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).
Maybe that family is really struggling right now who knows. We may never know why and that’s okay.

The waitress came back and asked if there’s anything we needed and Jake said quietly, “ I know this is a weird question but how much is their bill,” and pointed at the table.

She replied, “ that’s okay” and showed him the total. He said, “ okay, we would like to pay for their dinner but don’t tell them who it is or what it’s for.”

​The waitress lit up and smiled. She was delighted to see a random act of kindness. She brought back the checks and we did the total. With the tip our bill and their bill it was $124. A little bit more than what Jake had originally said but we couldn’t have planned it if we tried.


Doing what we felt God was telling us to do brought so much joy to both of us. We went from being frustrated to full belly laughing and smiling. In the small moments of life like this, they make it all worth living. My hope for you today is to listen to those promptings in your heart and in your mind. You never know how much impact you can have on the world around you.

Even if you can’t see the end result, share that light it will lift you up when you’re down. When you share God‘s light it penetrates the darkness. Whatever you’re going through, whatever you’re feeling I promise it won’t be like that forever.


We left before they got the bill but my hope is that they found joy and uplifting through a random act of kindness.

Romans 8:28
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

​www.mellottmedia.com
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Power of a Praying Woman & Wife 02/14- Week One

2/18/2018

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Happy Valentines Day / 2:15 PM / Google Hangouts Chat
This content is taken from multiple websites and the Bible. All credit goes to the references below.

My goal is to share with you information that will be beneficial to your prayer life, faith walk, and enrich your relationships. This is our first weeks session of content. You can join us each week if you would like. This study is not just subject to wives. 

Week One

Topics of Discussion:
A - How to be a godly woman and what that looks like
B - Our identity in Christ
C - How we view ourselves
D - How to Grow in our identity as wives
E - How to pray like a godly woman and what it looks like


A- How to be a godly woman and what that looks like.

Take a second and write down what you think a godly woman looks like before you continue reading and see the definition. Compare and contrast your original thoughts to what the Biblical definition is. What is different and does your perspective change? 

Scriptures and attributes:

1. SEEK GOD FIRST: Reject the lie that anything or anyone else can satisfy you.
“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. So
do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its
own.” – Matthew 6:33-34

Other Scripture:
1 Chronicles 16:8-12, Psalm 9:10, Psalm 27:1-5, Psalm 34:10-14, Psalm 40:16, Jeremiah
29:11-13, Zephaniah 2:3, Matthew 6:25-34

2. SPEAK FAITHFULLY: Love others with godly wisdom, boldness, and kindness as a faithful
completer of others. Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all the unfortunate. Open your mouth, judge
righteously, and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy. – Proverbs 31:8-9
She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. – Proverbs
31:26

Other Scripture:
Psalm 19:14, Proverbs 12:18, Proverbs 13:3, Proverbs 16:13, Proverbs 20:15, Proverbs 24:26
3. SHOW TRUE BEAUTY: Bodies deteriorate; persons develop. Invest in that which lasts.
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised. –
Proverbs 31:30

Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not
with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments, but rather by means of good works, as
is proper for women making a claim to godliness. – 1 Timothy 2:9-10

Other Scripture:
1 Samuel 16:7, Proverbs 11:22, 1 Peter 3:3-5

4. STAY HUMBLE: Be constantly aware of pride and selfishness. Don’t think less of yourself but
think of yourself less.
“Has not my hand made all these things, and so they came into being?” declares the LORD.
“These are the ones I look on with favor: those who are humble and contrite in spirit, and who
tremble at my word.” – Isaiah 66:2

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as
more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also
for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus. –
Philippians 2:3-5

Other Scripture:
Psalm 141:5, Proverbs 3:5-6, Proverbs 12:1, Micah 6:8, John 15:5, 1 Peter 3:8-9,1 Peter 5:5-7

5. SERVE THE LORD: Set your mind on eternal things, serve the eternal King, and live to
please only Him.
“He who loves his life loses it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it to life eternal. If
anyone serves Me, he must follow Me; and where I am, there My servant will be also; if anyone
serves Me, the Father will honor him.” – John 12:25-26

For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still
trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ. – Galatians 1:10
Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men. – Colossians 3:23

Other Scripture:
Psalm 16:11, Psalm 84:10-12, Mark 10:42-45, 2 Corinthians 5:10, Philippians 1:21, Hebrews
6:10, 1 Peter 2:21-23

A Part 2-
Let’s take a look at what it means to be godly and where it talks about it in scripture.

My original thoughts of a godly woman was a woman that was perfect and never made any mistakes. As
I came to know Christ and have a relationship with the creator, I realized how wrong this was and how the
enemy had put this lie in my head with the truths of my past self. Because of what Jesus did, we can come to God with confidence and boldness in the darkest times of lives and receive the mercy and grace He has to offer us (Hebrews 4:14-16). We serve such an amazing God! 


Dictionary Definition:
Godly living is described as conforming to the laws and wishes of God; devout; pious.
coming from God; divine. Also referred to as righteous living.

The Bible has a great deal to say about godliness for both men and women. Most references to
godliness do not differentiate between the attributes of a godly man and a godly woman. Both
men and women, if they belong to Christ by faith, have exhibited a godly sorrow that “produces
repentance leading to salvation” (2 Corinthians 7:10). Without the gift of salvation by grace
through faith, no man or woman can be truly godly. The word godly in the Bible means “pious”
or “holy.” But piety and holiness are only achieved when we are made new creations in Christ (2
Corinthians 5:17). Born-again Christians are indwelled by the Holy Spirit who produces
godliness in us as He sanctifies us and molds us into the image of Christ. By His grace we are
able to “live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age” (Titus 2:12).

Godliness manifests itself in our lives when we are in control of our appetites and desires. We
live in a worldly culture and must resist ungodly influences around us. One way a godly woman
distinguishes herself from the world is by her self-control. She practices restraint and does not
give free rein to uninhibited emotions, attitudes, words, and appetites.

The godly woman controls her thoughts, taking them captive and making them obedient to
Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). She controls her emotions and doesn’t allow them to control her.
She controls her appetites and doesn’t display an unbridled passion for food and drink. She also
controls her tongue, which James tells us is like “a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the
body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on
fire by hell” (James 3:6).

This means gossip and unwholesome talk. We need women who are kind & gentle. There are
enough tough & cruel women in this world. The speech of a godly woman is one that edifies
and encourages rather than tearing down with idle gossip. The godly woman also does not
allow profanity and “unwholesome talk” to come out of her mouth (Ephesians 4:29).

Scripture says that a godly woman dresses modestly and adorns herself with “good deeds,
appropriate for women who profess to worship God” (1 Timothy 2:9–10). Christian women
should be able to see the vanity inherent in the allurements of a world “under the control of the
evil one” (1 John 5:19). A godly woman is not fooled by the lies that try to convince her that
attractiveness, personal worth, and fulfillment are found in physical, external beauty. The godly
woman’s affections are fixed on Christ, her Savior, and she makes every effort to follow His
example of good works. She has a heavenly focus, and she seeks to adorn herself with
godliness, not worldliness.

Your Identity comes from Christ and that is where we are to find our value and worth.
Being a godly woman involves living in “purity and reverence” (1 Peter 3:2). The godly woman
knows that her beauty does not come “from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles
and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes” (verse 3). Rather, she focuses on her “inner self,
the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. This is the
way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves” (verses
4–5). Peter speaks of the relationship between a godly woman and her husband, referencing
Sarah as an example to be emulated: “They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like
Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is
right and do not give way to fear” (verses 5–6).

The godly woman trains herself to resist the world’s temptations as she practices piety. Like an
athlete who uses repetition to become proficient in her sport, the godly woman continually fills
her mind with the truths of Scripture. In addition, she appeals regularly to the Spirit to help her
train her thoughts, attitudes, words, and desires to reflect those of her beloved Lord. “For bodily
exercise profits a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that
now is and of that which is to come” (1 Timothy 4:8).

The godly woman has “sincere faith” like Eunice and Lois (2 Timothy 2:5). She is kind, like Ruth
(Ruth 1:8). She lives righteously, as Elizabeth did (Luke 1:5–6). She is of “noble character” and
seeks to follow the example set by the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31:10–31. She shows good
judgment, generosity, and prudence as did Abigail (1 Samuel 25).

B - Our identity in Christ
If you are to describe yourself to someone who does not know you how/what would you say?
Ex) I am a mom. I am a wife. I am a teacher. Etc

Think about this question and reflect. 
Who do you think you are to God? 
This question made me address many things in my faith and my thinking about God and myself. 

Lies We Believe About Ourselves
If we’re honest with ourselves, we often feel insecure. Those who hide it best often feel it most.
But our insecurity is an invitation from God to escape the danger of false beliefs about who we
are and find true peace in who he is.

Identity as a Gift from God
At the heart of what it means to be a Christian is to receive a new identity. In Jesus, we do not
lose our true selves, but we become our true selves, only in him.
New Belonging in Jesus

Christ is our life
Not only the guarantee of it in heaven, but the down payment of it by the Spirit
now, as he lives in us. His joy becomes our joy; his love, our love; his peace, our peace; his
strength, our strength.

United to Jesus
We cannot experience anything greater than the fullness of union with Christ. Nothing reaches
higher or is more theologically comprehensive.

Citizens of Heaven
In Christ, we are fundamentally new, and belong to the people of heaven. The language and
values and customs and expectations of this world increasingly feel foreign to us. We have been
born again for another world, to a greater kind of existence.

C - How we view ourselves
Draw who we see in the mirror and write words that describe us around the image you  draw.
What does this drawing reveal about yourself? 

This exercise is to help address predisposed notions and ideas that are untrue
about ourselves and who we are in Christ.

How does this relate to our identity in Christ?

D - How to grow in our identity as a woman & wife
​

She Rests in God
. . . let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle
and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. (1 Peter 3:4)

A woman who knows her God will put her hope in God and find her rest in God. She calms and
quiets her soul, and she does not flail and strive against the God who is her refuge and who
determines her circumstances.

Trusting God to be who he says that he is, she is still before him and waits patiently for him. She
does not seek to justify herself and exact revenge for the wrongs that have been done to her, for
her strong tower and refuge is the name of the Lord in whom she hopes. She waits for the Lord
(Psalm 37:7, 9, 34).

She Submits to Her Husband

For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to
their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. (1 Peter 3:5–6)

An overflow of a wife’s hope and rest in God is submission to her husband. Sarah submitted to
Abraham because she trusted in and obeyed God. Her submission to her husband was not due
to her reliance upon Abraham. Rather, her eyes were fixed on a trustworthy God who was
worthy of her submission. When a woman refuses to obey God’s command to submit to her
husband, she follows in the footsteps of Eve, the mother of her flesh. This muddies the gospel
that God designed to be showcased through her marriage.

She Is Fearless
And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. (1 Peter
3:6) A woman who hopes in God is not afraid, because she knows her God. She is not afraid of the
path that her God has called her to walk. She is not afraid of sickness. She is not afraid of the
future. She is not afraid of death and dark valleys. She entrusts to God her children, her
marriage, and her ministry. She advances the kingdom through fearless submission to God’s
design for womanhood, marriage, motherhood, and ministry, because she hopes in God.

E -How to pray like a godly woman and what it looks like?
Your prayer live and practicing the traits of a godly woman will help you grow spiritually, in your
faith walk with God, and in your worldly relationships.
Be dedicated to praying and intentional with your time.

How to Pray?
And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind,
be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints. Pray also for me, that whenever I open
my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the
gospel. . . . — Ephesians 6:18-19

Here are some examples of what your prayer life can look like with intentional and dedicated
time to pray for specific things in life. You don’t have to stick to this specifically unless you want to.
If you already have a routine that’seven better, continue that or add more to it if you feel lead.

A Prayer for each Day:
Monday: Pray for your Family - Take time to pray for each member of your family. This includes
your own family, children, parents, grandparents, relatives, extended families. Give each member
to the Lord. Pray that He draws them "ever one step close" wherever they are in their
relationship with God. Be specific as you can as you pray that He will meet them at their point of
need.God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus
Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. - Ephesians 1:5

Tuesday: Pray for your Church Family - Take time to pray for the members in your church, for
the elders, ministers as they minister the word of God. Pray for all the families and children in
the church. Pray for the church around the world. Pray that each and everyone in the Lord will
stay firm in the word of God till the end and will be blessed to enter the kingdom of God. Pray
that Gospel will be preached around the world as the most important standard.

Now I would remind you, brothers, of the gospel I preached to you, which you received, in
which you stand, and by which you are being saved, if you hold fast to the word I preached to
you—unless you believed in vain. For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also
received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that
he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures, and that he appeared to
Cephas, then to the twelve. Then he appeared to more than five hundred brothers at one time,
most of whom are still alive, though some have fallen asleep. Then he appeared to James, then
to all the apostles. Last of all, as to one untimely born, he appeared also to me. For I am the
least of the apostles, unworthy to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God.
But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace toward me was not in vain. On the
contrary, I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with
me. Whether then it was I or they, so we preach and so you believed. - 1 Corinthians 15:1-11

Wednesday: Pray for your Community - Take time to pray for those around you, the groups you
are in and pray for their needs and God will meet them at their points. Pray for those in your
workplaces, school, sports team, neighbors etc. Pray for those who have not received Christ as
their Savior, pray they will find Him.

Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of
low position. Do not be conceited. - Romans 12:16
For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have
the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to
all the others. - Romans 12:4-5

Thursday: Pray for the Nation - Pray for those in authority. Pray they make wise decisions and
God's will for that nation. Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor. - 1 Peter 2:17

Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from
God, and those that exist have been instituted by God." - Romans 13:1

Friday: Pray for the World - Pray that God will use His people to help others "to know Christ and
to make Him known."Pray for the persecuted church. Finally, pray for the advance of the Gospel
everywhere.

And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in all the world as a witness to all the nations,
and then the end will come.- Matthew 24:14

Saturday: Pray for the Homeless, needy, the less fortunate - Take time to pray for the physically
and spiritually afflicted. Pray specifically for ministries that are reaching out to the helpless,
hopeless, hurting and lost.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him
shall not perish but have eternal life. - John 3:16

Sunday: Pray for Personal Guidance - Finally, take time to pray for your own personal needs.
Walk with God through every aspect of your life — your personal, family, work, community, and
church aspects of your life. Say, " Speak whatever to me, Lord, I'm listening!"

And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all
discernment, so that you may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the
day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory
and praise of God. - Philippians 1:9-11

Prayer is the most important conversation of the day — with the Creator of the universe who is
there, who cares, and who listens with an ear to respond both for His glory and for the good of
people!

Next week we will talk about the differences throughout the week and how our weeks went.
What changed in our prayer lives or relationships.



References:
http://www.dictionary.com/browse/godliness
https://bible.org/article/what-godliness
http://www.watermark.org/blog/how-to- be-a- godly-woman
https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/the-fourfold- beauty-of- a-godly- woman
https://www.desiringgod.org/topics/identity-in- christ#citizens-of- heaven
http://www.godlywoman.co/2015/03/prayer-how- to-pray.html?m=1
Holy Bible NIV & Scriptures 
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Diving into the Mission Field

10/16/2017

1 Comment

 
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Hey Everyone!
Most of you know me, but for those who don’t, my name is Heather. I am a recent college graduate who loves to serve the lord. My goal is to become a full-time missionary wherever God leads me. Currently I am in Oceanside, CA and I am focusing on ministering to the homeless.
I am passionate about serving the homeless in the community because for one The Lord has really put it on my heart because at one point in my life I was homeless. During my mom’s break up with her ex-husband, we had to stay at a shelter for 5 weeks until we were able to move into an available place to rent.
The face of homelessness can be any of us. It doesn’t matter who you are it can be you at any point of your life. The point of me telling you this is to show that it doesn’t matter where you have been or what you have done, God can use you and your experiences as a platform for His glory.


I have the deepest passion and desire in my heart to do this. Not for myself, but because of The Lord. He took my old desires and gave me new ones. He gave me a heart to serve everyone. It brings me the most joy and happiness. This is where I find my purpose and I see His plan for my life unfold.


If you feel lead to support me in the Mission Field, please use this link:

https://www.paypal.me/hpoutreach


Most of all I need your prayers! Please pray for guidance, protection, wisdom, and the redemption of God’s people.

Thank you all so much!


With Love,

Heather Pollock


If you have any questions, use the contact me section in the blog to reach me.

You can also connect with me on Instagram and Facebook.
Send me a shoutout or message. I love you all!




Matthew 28:19-20
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.
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How to apply the 5 love languages in your relationship with God?

10/5/2017

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When I was home visiting my family in Wyoming for the forth of July, my mom surprised me with a gift she had picked up weeks before I had arrived. She was so excited to give it to me and so giddy. Her eyes always light up with so much life when she has a fit to give. She calls these "I love you gifts." It is a tradition that I have carried on into adulthood. If you know my mom she has a sweet, gentle, kind, and childlike spirit.
Her gift was a book called The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. She loves giving me gifts even though that is not my primary receiving love language. She is very thoughtful in trying to give all 5 love languages to my brother and I. I am grateful that she thought of me enough to pick up the book for me because most likely I would have missed out. It was a good read and if you are looking for a self improvement or communication book I suggest starting with it. (There is a link below to purchase the book online in case you want it).

This book gave me a lot of insight about myself and my current relationships with others. These last few months, I started to think more purposefully when dealing with people in general and this book helped keep me on that path. What I say to others (Ephesians 4:29-31) and my actions towards others (Ephesians 4:32) . Are my actions intentional or do they have purpose? Am I just being tossed around in the waves of life? Am I being a true woman of God? I have been thinking a lot about these things, but it has been good and I have had so much growth in doing so.
I gave myself a challenge and it is being proactive in ways that I can give people what they are so desperately wanting. This could be as simple as conversations or interactions at work, home, in public, church, relationship, etc. that ultimately fulfill one if not more of a person’s love languages (this doesn’t mean compromising my morals or values).
Just ponder this thought for a moment as you continue to read. What areas can you work on in your life or what people in your life would benefit from purposefully trying to meet someone’s love language?

Digging deeper into what the 5 love languages that Gary Chapman writes about shed light into a whole new perspective I didn’t think of before.
What if we apply the 5 love languages to our relationship with God? What would that look like?

The 5 love languages are as followed:

1. Words
This love language is for people who prefer the words of affirmation. For example, hearing "I love you" and other compliments that align with what they value most. Words hold value within all languages and for some people this is what makes them feel like they are loved. Personally, this is the way I receive love from others (and time). Having the assurance from my boss that I am doing a great job makes me feel appreciated and eager to push harder for success. Knowing that my family or partner is pleased with me as well makes me happy and have the assurance I need to feel like I am receiving love the way I need.
Additionally, negative or insulting comments cut deeply and are not easily forgotten, but they are forgiven (Matthew 6:14-15).
The biggest lie that I was told as a child was "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me." I really dislike that I was taught that because it is so far from the truth. I have broke multiple bones and I would rather take a broken bone any day over a broken heart. Before God brought healing and understanding of grace and forgiveness into my life, words of those who had hurt me would echo in my head and the torment of the past often crippled me from growing into the woman God made me to be. It seemed like no escape from the hurtful things people had said to me. Words do matter, even if it is not your love language you can do a lot of good and a lot of damage to the ones you love. So with words our self-image and confidence is built through compliments and verbal praise. A person feels loved when people know what is important to you. Tone of voice is very important to people with this love language. Knowing how to properly receive and give this love language can change relationships vastly!

2. Time
People with this love language value being together and doing things together. Focusing in on one another is the best way to show love for these people. If this is your love language, you want your friend or spouse to give you undivided attention and do meaningful activities with you. This includes quality conversation, hobbies, sports, etc. Knowing how to give time to your loved ones or significant other is important if this is their love language. It is worth investing in because the quality of your relationship will skyrocket.
If you are experiencing difficulties in your relationship start by being present. Find out what your partner or loved one enjoys doing. It doesn’t have to be expensive, but plan time to do that activity. If it is music take them to a free concert, if it is a sport hit some balls at the driving range or shoot some hoops. Quantity time over quality time is key here. Consistency is what is needed.
I love when people have a willing heart to serve God with me. This is one way I receive love other than words. It is something that is so dear to my heart. My parents taught me that community service was never a punishment like most people who get into trouble experience, but that it is our duty as part of the community to be involved in making it a better place. I’m so grateful for that. I think this is why it is one of my passions and why it comes first nature for me. Find that passion and help it blossom in your relationships!

3. Gifts
Some people receive love in the form of gifts. These gifts don’t have to be expensive to send a powerful message of love. They can be purchased, found, or made. Just like my moms tradition of “I love you gifts.” These gifts can be literally anything that reminds you of the person or simply remembering something they wanted and surprising them.
Spouses who forget a birthday or anniversary or who never give gifts to someone who truly enjoys this love language will find themselves with a spouse who feels neglected and unloved. This can also include the gift of your presence during a crisis or when they need your support most.
​This got me
thinking about how much impact on the divorce rate there would be if people knew more about their partners love language before they got married. Even a step further, how their partner's love language has changed over the course of their marriage. Add children to the mix how much it changes then.

4. Acts of service
Loving someone whose language is “acts of service” requires time and creativity. Acts of service need to be done not out of feeling burdened or forced but with delight in order for the acts to be perceived as a gift of love. Here are some examples: cleaning someone’s house, running an errand or favor, doing tasks without being asked, being willing to help out in needed areas, etc.
Parents can relate to this one easily. If you have kids it can be a task juggling work schedules, sports practices, school, charities events, home life, etc. Helping your spouse or parent manage these tasks can really show your appreciation and love for people whose primary love language is acts of service.

5. Touch
This form of love language is felt with meaningful touch. Some people feel the most connection and receive love when they are being touched. Having the transfer of energy is another way to look at this. Finding a healthy balance of touch is important to give as a spouse and as a parent. Teaching the appropriate type of touch and the right time and place is also important with this love language.
Some examples of touch can include hugs, shoulder massages, leaning against the other person, holding hands, etc.


My goal is to incorporate all 5 love languages in my relationship with God’s creation and with God in a daily basis. I am so excited to the fruit the Holy Spirit will bear by doing so (Galatians 5:22-23).

John 15:12 says, “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you." I realized how purposeful God is at using love languages with us. It is written in so many places in the Bible.

I thought about this for a while. God shows us how he is continuously purposeful with love language with his creation, so it intrigued me to start doing the same thing in my relationship with my creator. In everything I started being purpose driven.

1. Words
How I convey my love language of words with God to build my relationship with Him is through prayer, singing worship music, and/or speaking truth. There is purpose behind my words that I have put into action (Hebrew 4:12).

​
2. Time
How I show my love language of time with God is by being purposeful and proactive with my time. This can be spending time in prayer, studying the word, serving in the areas he tells me to go, basically being intentional with my time with God.

​3. Gifts
How I show my love language of gifts to God is by using my spiritual gifts to help build His kingdom. This is important because God has give each of us talents (Matthew 25:40) to use for His glory and benefit His creation. By holding back our spiritual gifts, we are not experiencing the full capacity of our relationship with God and others. By using our gifts for God’s glory, this is an act of worship and another way to honor who God created you to be.
There are three main passages describing the spiritual gifts in scripture. Romans 12:6–8, 1 Corinthians 12:4–11 and 1 Corinthians 12:28 are the main passages that identify spiritual gifts and what they are. The spiritual gifts that are identified in Romans 12 are prophesying, serving, teaching, encouraging, giving, leadership, and mercy. The spiritual gifts described in 1 Corinthians 12:4–11 include the word of wisdom, the word of knowledge, faith, healing, miraculous powers, prophecy, distinguishing between spirits, speaking in tongues, and interpretation of tongues. The spiritual gifts explained in 1 Corinthians 12:28 includes healing, helps, governments, and diversities of tongues. Each role is important in the growth of our faith and the kingdom of God.
If you would like to find out more information about your spiritual gifts, click the link below to take the test.
http://giftstest.com/

4. Acts of Service
How I demonstrate acts of service to God in the form of love language is by loving His people (John 13:35) and serving in the areas that need it whatever that may be (1 Corinthians 10:31). There is nothing we can do to earn our way into heaven (Ephesians 2:8-9), but acts of service are important because they show our reverence, respect, build His kingdom, and demonstrate thankfulness for what Jesus did on the cross (John 3:16). Because of how thankful I am for what Jesus did for me and all of you, my heart has the passion and desire to serve God with so much joy. It is one way I am able to worship Him in more than just on area of my life.

​5. Touch
This love language is more difficult to give to God since we do not see Him in physical form daily. This doesn’t mean that He is not present in our everyday lives or that He doesn’t reveal Himself in different ways to us. We can touch the lives of others and in doing so touch God’s heart (Luke 6:31; Matthew 5:16; Romans 11:36). For example honoring him in our daily actions, thoughts, deeds, etc. This could be through prayer, serving people or animals, sacrificing our wants for a better purpose, there are so many ways to show this love language depending on the person He created you to be.

I hope this information has given you ideas to ponder and explore. I hope that you. Can apply some of this information to your lives and benefit from it greatly. I love you all and I want nothing more than for you to have blessed, abundant, fruitful, laughter filled, holy lives.

Let me know now how these love languages have changed your lives if you take on this challenge. Remember be purposeful with your your life! You weren’t created to be mediocre! God has plans and a future for you (Jeremiah 29:11)!



My Prayer for you
Father, I pray over all your people. That you fill us with your Holy Spirit. That you make us purposeful with our time. I pray for awakening in our relationships with others and in our relationship with you. I ask that you comfort those who are struggling and give them your peace. Your burden is light and your love is great. Help is trust you with all areas of our lives and give us revelation of the paths you want us to walk. Thank you for all you do!
In Jesus name we pray! Amen




Link to the book The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman:

​The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/p/the-five-love-languages-chapman-gary/1112878508/2678059208982?st=PLA&sid=BNB_DRS_Core+Catch-All,+Low_00000000&2sid=Google_&sourceId=PLGoP79700​
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What is Discipleship?

10/4/2017

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Acts 14:22
"...strengthening the souls of the disciples, encouraging them to continue in the faith, and saying, "Through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God.""

A Christian disciple is a person who accepts and assists in the spreading of the good news of Jesus Christ. ​
Christian discipleship is the process by which disciples grow in the Lord Jesus Christ and are equipped by the Holy Spirit, who resides in our hearts, to overcome the trials of this life and become more like Christ along the way. This process requires people to respond and be open to the Holy Spirit’s guidance. The Holy Spirit guides us to spiritual growth in our ideas, thoughts, words and actions and when things may feel confusing it is our job to pray and compare everything to the Word of God. I find that this truly works when we a proactive and in the word daily. When we are purposeful with our time and dedication to the growth of our relationship with Christ. When we ask God to fill us with the Holy Spirit, we begin to change from the inside out. Additionally, we should be willing to share our testimony with others(1 Peter 3:15) and to disciple others to walk with Christ. We then should encourage others to do the same and continue to allow God to make disciples (GotQuestions Ministries, 2017)!

Let's take a look at what Scripture says about being a disciple. Being a disciple of Christ involves personal growth. These 5 characteristics are the basis of what discipleship looks like.


1. Putting Jesus FIRST in EVERYTHING (Mark 8:34-38). To be a disciple of Christ, we are called to be set apart from the world. Our focus should be on our Lord and pleasing Him in every area of our lives. We live in a culture that pushes the opposite of this, so it is up to us to remain diligent and faithful to this. We must put off self-centered behavior and put on Christ-centered behavior. By doing this, God is able to use you for amazing things (GotQuestions Ministries, 2017)!

2. Following Jesus' teachings (John 8:31-32). As Christ followers, we must be obedient children and follow what the Word of God says. Obedience is the ultimate test of faith in God. We see this all throughout the Bible (Genesis 22). Jesus is a perfect example of obedience and following the Word. Jesus lived life on earth in complete obedience to our Father in Heaven (Philippians 2:6-8) (GotQuestions Ministries, 2017).

3. Being Fruitful (John 15:5-8). Our job is not producing fruit. Many people believe that it is their job to do this, but our job is to follow Christ. By doing this, the Holy Spirit produces fruitfulness, and this fruit is the result of our obedience. We are the direct representation of Christ to the world. The more we are obedient to the Lord and learn to walk in His ways, we can see how our lives change. The biggest change will take place in our hearts, and the overflow of this will be new conduct (thoughts, words and actions) representative of that change. The change we seek is done from the inside out, through the power of the Holy Spirit. It isn’t something we can accomplish on our own (GotQuestions Ministries, 2017).

4. Love for others (John 13:34-35). We are told that love of other believers is the evidence of our being a part of God's family (1 John 3:10). Love is defined and elaborated on by Paul in 1 Corinthians 13:1-13. These verses demonstrate to us that love is not an emotion; it is action. This is different than the love that society has explained to so many of us. Quite frankly, I am a huge fan of Biblical love. We must put our 'love' in action and motion. Furthermore, we are told to think more highly of others than of ourselves and to look out for their interests (Philippians 2:3-4).  Philippians 2:5 gives us the depiction of what we are to do when it comes to everything in life. Our attitude about things should be the same as Jesus'. Jesus gave us the perfect example to help us in our walk with God (GotQuestions Ministries, 2017).

5. Evangelism - Making disciples (Matthew 28:18-20). We are to share our faith and tell nonbelievers about the wonderful changes Jesus Christ has made in our lives. No matter how mature we are in our Christian life, we can be used by God. God equips the willing and He is always looking for people who will listen and follow what He is asking. Most of the time people believe the lies from the enemy that we don't really know enough or haven't been a Christian long enough to make a difference. This is not too at all! Some of the most influential Christians are new believers. These Christians may not know many Bible verses off of the top of their heads, but they have experienced the love and grace of God in a deep way. Evangelism helps increase the depth of a believers relationship with God (GotQuestions Ministries, 2017).



Reference:
GotQuestions Minsitries. (2017). What is Christian Discipleship? Retrieved October 4, 2017, from
https://www.gotquestions.org/Christian-discipleship.html​


Scriptures on Discipleship

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[UN]COMMON GROUND

10/3/2017

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Common ground is defined as opinions or interests shared by each of two or more parties. It is our nature to group together with people of like mindsets, values, morals, and lifestyles. In most cases this is a good thing, but this mindset also causes division in people. People were designed to be in fellowship and unity with others. Psalm 133:1 says, "How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!"

As a Christian this desire burns in my heart. We have been given the perfect instruction (the Bible) on how to live life and many of us cease to take the opportunities this instruction provides us to live a full and abundant life. What if we stepped out in boldness to solve some of the most controversial issues in our society? What if we put down our hurt, frustration, and/or pain and used it to impact and change the lives around us? I want to show the world who God truly calls us to be and break the negative stereotypes that Christians have accumulated over the years.

My mission is to have a positive influence on the community, spread God's love with everyone, explore topics in society and how it relates to the Bible and us, and lastly how we can improve ourselves along the way. The challenge that I have for you is to find the areas of [UN]COMMON GROUND in society and be salt and light in those areas. Find something you are passionate about and start there. For example, I am passionate about helping the homeless. I spend time volunteering, raising money, giving supplies, and thinking of ways outside of the box to benefit the homeless community in my area.

This is just one example and one small area that needs work in our world. If you are passionate about sports find a way to impact the lives of children or adults and relate it to sports. If you are Pro-Life find a positive way to promote adoption. Volunteer at a pregnancy clinic or reach out to local abortion clinics and provide information and time to those seeking other options. If you know people addicted to drugs or alcohol, find ways to engage with those needing help, seeking help, etc. There are so many areas in society that we can find common ground in, whether we agree or disagree.

Being comfortable and putting ourselves in a protective bubble from the world is the last thing we need to do. I am only one person, so I am calling people young and old to join in making a difference in the communities we live in. We are a chosen generation. "
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations.. (Matthew 28:19)."

Each week I will post on a topic and I hope to have great conversations with everyone! Send me ideas for topics or prayer requests. I just want to interact with all of you and share some of my thoughts, hopes, passions, dreams, goals, and knowledge with. I’m so excited!

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Think outside the box. Be creative, be bold,  be loving, be compassionate, and do great things!

Matthew 5:13-16 “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot. You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven."


-Heather Feather

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    My name is Heather. Most people call me Feather. I am a recent college graduate from Colorado Christian University with a Bachelor's of Science in Organizational Management in Christian Leadership.
    ​ I live in the San Diego area with my husband Jake . He's my best friend and I am excited to see where God takes us. We have two kitties that we rescued from the Humane Society. I love spending time with family & friends. My favorite place in the world is the Pacific Ocean. 
    I am passionate about serving God and people. I attend North Coast Church in Vista, CA. I volunteer in my local community and I just try to make a positive impact in the world. ​

    -Joshua 1:9-

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